By Denise Gee Peacock

National Missing Children’s Day has long been a lodestar for families of missing children—a safe harbor for gathering with child protection professionals who on that day are recognized by the U.S. Department of Justice (DOJ) for being at the top of their game.

This year that star shone brighter than ever, largely fueled by the unwavering advocacy work of nearly a dozen surviving family members—including parents and siblings—who have endured the nightmare of a missing child, brother, or sister. Their presence at the May 22 commemoration, and related events, was deeply moving—despite the fact that “all of us belong to a club that no one ever wants to belong to,” says parent survivor Ahmad Rivazfar.

Photograph of OJJDP Administrator Liz Ryan with this quote: “Surviving family members know firsthand the torment, confusion, and emotional exhaustion of losing a child. They lived it, and have channeled that sorrow into resources to help others.”That club’s members include parents and siblings desperate to find their missing loved ones, whose whereabouts remain unknown. They are also families who will forever grieve a child who was abducted, sexually assaulted, and murdered; families of children illegally taken out of the country by an estranged parent; families who have fortunately been reunited with their once-missing child, but now work to become whole again.

These family survivors’ stories were invaluable to discussions during the 2024 National Missing Children’s Day events. The AMBER Alert Training & Technical Assistance Program (AATTAP) and National Criminal Justice Training Center (NCJTC) hosted the family members at the events, with support from the DOJ’s Office of Justice Programs (OJP) and Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention (OJJDP).

The AATTAP-NCJTC team and surviving family members were unified in promoting their work on two updated DOJ resources for parents and families of missing children: When Your Child Is Missing: A Family Survival Guide (released last year) and the forthcoming sibling-focused survival guide, What About Me? Finding Your Path When Your Brother or Sister Is Missing.

Collaboration for a clearer path forward

The day before the National Missing Children’s Day commemoration, surviving family members paid a visit to the Alexandria, Virginia, headquarters of the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children (NCMEC). Afterward they attended a private AATTAP reception recognizing their contributions to ensuring family members across the nation have access to the latest information and resources.

They also previewed video segments from a filming project completed earlier this year, one in which contributors to the forthcoming What About Me? sibling survival guide shared their insights and advice to illuminate its content for readers. The videos will be offered alongside the sibling guide (after its release later this year) on the Family Survival Guide website.

During the National Missing Children’s Day ceremony, the group received thanks for their efforts from U.S. Assistant Attorney General Amy L. Solomon, OJJDP Administrator Liz Ryan, and NCMEC President and CEO Michelle DeLaune—as well as attendee applause—when they were asked to stand for recognition.

They also heard from nationally revered parent-advocate and retired AATTAP-NCJTC Associate Patty Wetterling, who was a featured speaker at the event. Wetterling is the mother of Jacob Wetterling, who was abducted and murdered in 1989. (Read more about her search for him, and her new book, Dear Jacob, here—and an excerpt from her Missing Children’s Day talk below.) Wetterling also helped update the new edition of the Family Survival Guide, released in 2023.

During the session, the family members discussed their experiences with being a part of these survival guide projects, along with their ongoing needs and goals as surviving family members who have experienced a missing child or sibling.

Photo of family survivors Kimber Biggs (right) and Pamela Foster (left) with AATTAP Administrator Janell Rasmussen. Adjacent to the image is this quote from Kimber Biggs, AATTAP-NCJTC Associate and sibling survivor-contributor to the forthcoming resource guide, "What About Me? Finding Your Path When Your Brother or Sister Is Missing“: "Speaking with OJJDP about crucial topics, working with dedicated AATTAP and NCJTC leaders, and collaborating with parents who radiate light and strength, was insightful and inspiring. It contributes to my healing—and motivates me to keep climbing.”

They also offered OJJDP and AATTAP leaders recommendations on ways to best support families and more broadly promote awareness and distribution of critically important resources for families, law enforcement, and child advocates.

Following through on a commitment made by OJJDP Administrator Ryan last year during her impactful meeting with the Family Survival Guide contributors at the conclusion of the Missing Children’s Day ceremony, this year’s event included an inaugural, private Family Roundtable discussion with sibling guide family contributors.

Commemoration highlights

Each year, the DOJ honors agencies, organizations, law enforcement officials, and others whose exemplary and heroic efforts have helped recover missing children and prosecute those who harm them.

“Our commemoration is taking a new format this year,” Ryan explained. “OJJDP decided not only to highlight the tremendous work of those who protect children, but also address the challenges in this work—to learn more about issues involving missing kids, and hold in-depth conversations with youth and families of missing and murdered children and other experts on these topics.”

Fifth grader Hannah L. of South Carolina is shown holding a plaque for winning the 2024 National Missing Children's Day poster contest. She is accompanied by her mother, AATTAP Administrator Janell Rasmussen (left) and South Carolina AMBER Alert Coordinator Alex Schelble (right). An embedded link notes: "See participating states’ winning posters for the 2024 National Missing Children’s Day contest at bit.ly/NMCD2024posters." Hanna's winning poster is also shown. It represents children being found as missing pieces of a puzzle, and includes a quote from her: "Those who help bring back missing children change the whole picture completely."

After the commemoration, a cadre of experts, including a youth advocate with lived experience in the foster care system, joined a panel discussion on why so many children and young adults go missing from care. “They will suggest ways to improve collaboration and ensure the well-being of these children,” Ryan said. She next recognized members of the Family Roundtable—parents, siblings and others with a loved one who has gone missing. “Each of them has contributed to two very important [survival] documents.”

When Your Child Is Missing: A Family Survival Guide was announced at the 2023 Missing Children’s Day event. The new fifth edition provides a wider range of missing child situations; gives families instant access to information online; and allows them to hear advice and encouragement from the parents themselves, who speak in powerful videos.

As was the case with the Family Survival Guide, the What About Me? project was developed by AATTAP’s publications team with guidance and oversight from the OJJDP. Both initiatives were stewarded by Helen Connelly, retired FVTC-NCJTC Program Administrator who continues to share her expertise as an Associate employee.

Looking back—and ahead

“As you know thousands of children go missing in the U.S. every year,” Ryan said. “While most are safely recovered, others are found deceased and never identified. Currently there are more than 1,000 children whose remains have been found, but have not been identified. We want to help name them, and return them to their families, communities, and loved ones.”

The OJJDP and NCMEC, with support from the DOJ—and training and technical assistance from the AATTAP and NCJTC—will work with state and local law enforcement agencies to identify these children, Ryan explained, adding, “they deserve no less.”

The forthcoming sibling survival guide, What About Me?, will help a missing child’s siblings understand the emotional turmoil surrounding the crisis as well as the search process. It will offer trusted advice and firsthand insight into what to expect; tips for managing self-care and family dynamics; and guidance on how to deal with law enforcement, the courts, and the media.

Parent-advocate Patty Wetterling to DOJ and NCMEC: ‘You save lives. You saved mine.’

Photo of two women with this caption: Patty Wetterling (right) greets NCMEC’s Director of Special Projects Sherry Bailey during the family survivors’ visit to NCMEC headquarters in Arlington, Virginia.
Patty Wetterling (right) greets NCMEC’s Director of Special Projects Sherry Bailey during the family survivors’ visit to NCMEC headquarters in Arlington, Virginia.

NCMEC President and CEO Michelle DeLaune welcomed parent-advocate Patti Wetterling to speak, recognizing her as “a longtime friend and a personal source of inspiration.”

“Her son, Jacob, who went missing when he was 11 years old, was abducted near their home in Minnesota,” DeLaune said. “Patty has given her life to advocating for her son. She’s raised a beautiful family. And she’s a fierce mother, one who changes this world with every person she speaks to.”

Assistant U.S. Attorney General Amy L. Solomon added, “We’re so honored that you could be with us today, Patty. We’re indebted to you for your years of advocacy on behalf of missing children, and for the work you continue to do to claim a brighter future for our children.”

What follows is an excerpt of Wetterling’s remarks given at this year’s National Missing Children’s Day commemoration.

I want to thank you, Liz Ryan, for meeting with this amazing group. [Wetterling gestures to the family-survivor group attending the ceremony.] I belong over there with you, my heart is with you, and we draw strength from you. I also want to thank everybody at NCMEC and the DOJ. You save lives. You saved mine. 

National Missing Children’s Day is a time to shine a light on a dark topic. When my son, Jacob, was kidnapped, I knew nothing about crimes against children. ‘Who would do that?’ I cried, ‘Who would harm a child?’ It is an unimaginable pain.

After a few days, sleep deprived and depressed, I crawled into bed and pulled the covers over my head, deciding I’m never gonna get out of bed again. It’s too hard. It hurts too much. I can’t do it. But with tears streaming down my face, I suddenly saw Jacob curled up in a ball somewhere saying the same thing. ‘I can’t do this anymore. It’s too hard. They’re never going to find me.’

Screaming, I got up and said, ‘Hold on Jacob, we will find you! But you have to stay strong!’ I got out of bed. That decision to get out of bed was the first of many choices that I had to make.

That was in the early days, and in the 34 years that have followed, I decided I couldn’t live in the darkness. I chose to seek light instead. I chose to fight for the world that Jacob knew and loved—a world that was fair, kind, and safe for kids.

When I was given the phone number for the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children, I learned so much about the problem—how many children were missing and exploited, and what we all needed to do to bring them home. Most kids come home because somebody is aware of their abduction. They look at the pictures. And if they see something unusual about a child, or a child in a bad situation, they trust their instincts and call the police.

We tried to make sure everybody got Jacob’s pictures. We had to mail out pictures back in 1989. We sent them all over. My favorite story was when a couple was traveling from Minnesota to Florida and thought they saw Jacob. They recognized the picture and said, ‘He was with a man who’s very thin, and he didn’t look like he wanted to be with this guy.’ But they didn’t know who to call. So eventually they called the FBI in Minneapolis. When they described the man that this boy was with, the FBI agent knew who they were talking about…and caught up with him in Flagstaff, Arizona. And clearly [the child they found with him] wasn’t Jacob.

But at least one 12-year-old boy got to go home because somebody was aware of the problem. They looked at the pictures and took that extra step of being there for the child. In those 34 years since Jacob was kidnapped, I’ve learned we are stronger when we collectively pool ideas and resources through Team HOPE and the family and sibling survival guides, we support each other and offer assistance to other families walking down this difficult path.

We have to keep missing children in our hearts until we can hold them in our arms again.

We are all the hope for all missing children, as well as all children who are home safe today.

We can never give up hope.

And together, we can, and we will, build a safer world for all of our children.

Three photos representing successful recovery of children who were subjects of a MAILE AMBER Alert, plus a photo of searchers walking on a beach in Hawaii.
Hawaii County Mayor Mitch Roth’s social media post showed his gratitude for the safe recovery of a 15-year-old who was abducted from a beach (where searchers are seen). A news report and an alert poster spread the good news—located, canceled—on two other MAILE AMBER Alert cases.

By Jody Garlock

When the Honolulu Police Department issued a MAILE AMBER Alert in February 2024 for two brothers whose mother reported them missing and in potential danger, not even HPD officers could have predicted such a swift recovery. Within five minutes of the alert’s distinct alarm sounding on cellphones across Oahu Island, the mother’s former boyfriend said he would surrender the 10- and 11-year-old boys in a gas station parking lot. The case serves as a testament to the power of AMBER Alerts—or, as it’s called in Hawaii, the MAILE AMBER Alert, named in memory of 6-year-old Maile Gilbert (see “Three for three: lessons learned,” below) who was abducted and murdered in 1985, prior to the alert’s existence.

“With alert activations in a state like Hawaii with an isolated population, we find that abductors may feel the pressure to turn themselves in after either seeing the alert or being told there is one,” says Amanda Leonard, coordinator of the Missing Child Center Hawaii and statewide MAILE AMBER Alert Coordinator. Additionally, as in this case, local news reports stated that customers at the gas station who received the alert had promptly called in sightings to police.

Photo of Hawaii AMBER Alert Coordinator Amanda Leonard with this quote: “I don’t believe that there’s any room for mistakes when it comes to missing children. We’re not perfect, but we should always be striving for excellence.”

Soon after police arrived at the scene, the mother and her boys were able to drive away safely in the gray Honda Odyssey. The van belonged to the mother, who had given the former boyfriend permission to use it and take the boys on an errand. When he failed to return the children and stopped answering her calls after an argument, she contacted police. A subsequent report of a family member learning the man had struck one of the boys in the face, and therefore they may be in danger, escalated the case to meet the criteria for a MAILE AMBER Alert. The 54-year-old suspect was not immediately charged.

This recent case is the latest in a string of MAILE AMBER Alerts in a state that historically has had none. And for Leonard, it also serves as an example of the importance of public awareness and quick-thinking citizens willing to be an extra set of eyes to help keep children safe.

“Part of our culture here is really about family and children,” Leonard says. “We pride ourselves in not just looking out for our own children, but other people’s children in our community.”

Case by case

Hawaii put its MAILE AMBER Alert system in place in 2005, becoming the final state to join the nationwide AMBER Alert program. In a ceremony with Hawaiian officials, Tracy Henke, who at the time was Acting Assistant Attorney General for the U.S. Department of Justice’s Office of Justice Programs, called the establishment of statewide AMBER Alert plans in all 50 states “a landmark achievement that makes America’s children safer.”

Just four months later, the state had its first activation. In that case, a 4-month-old baby was safely recovered in Honolulu thanks to an attentive delivery truck driver. The driver had received a message about the missing infant from his dispatcher after an office worker saw the alert. (This was before the text-like wireless emergency alerts, or WEAs, began appearing on phones in subsequent years.) He spotted the stolen pickup truck, which had been abandoned with the infant safe inside.

Seventeen years then went by without any MAILE AMBER Alerts. Leonard speculates that had more to do with a lack of understanding about the program than about no cases meeting the criteria for issuing an alert. So when she began working at the Missing Child Center in 2018, she made it her mission to build relationships and enhance the education and training—including monthly tests of the system—with the state’s four county police departments. (In January, Hawaii’s statewide police force became operational; it stems from a 2022 bill then-Governor David Ige signed into law in an effort to allow more efficient and effective emergency response.) The MAILE AMBER Alert program will remain under the Hawaii Department of the Attorney General.

“We started to really revamp and aggressively work on improving our program with the help of the National Criminal Justice Training Center [NCJTC],” Leonard says.

Photo of two women standing in front of MAILE AMBER Alert signage. Caption for photo: “My joy is really for a family, knowing that they’re going to get the news that their child has been recovered alive,” says Amanda Leonard (right) coordinator of the Missing Child Center Hawaii and statewide MAILE AMBER Alert Coordinator. “That makes all the really tough stuff we do on a daily basis worth it.” She’s shown with program assistant Leina Diamond in front of their MAILE AMBER Alert signage.
“My joy is really for a family, knowing that they’re going to get the news that their child has been recovered alive,” says Amanda Leonard (right) coordinator of the Missing Child Center Hawaii and statewide MAILE AMBER Alert Coordinator. “That makes all the really tough stuff we do on a daily basis worth it.” She’s shown with program assistant Leina Diamond in front of their MAILE AMBER Alert signage.

Preparedness pays off 

In September 2022, authorities faced their most dramatic case—a rare stranger abduction that garnered national attention. This marked the first MAILE AMBER Alert on Hawaii Island, and also was the first time the state used a WEA to alert the public. A 15-year-old girl who was at a beach on the Big Island was forced at knifepoint to tie up her boyfriend and was led through a wooded area and across lava fields to the abductor’s vehicle. The man took her to his home on the opposite side of the island some 70 miles away, where he chained her up in an old school bus on the property.

As a massive air and ground search, which included volunteers from the community who galvanized after receiving the MAILE AMBER Alert, continued the next day, the teen convinced her abductor to take her to a café in the nearby town of Hilo to get something to eat. The café host felt something seemed off when he first spotted the duo, then it clicked: “That’s the AMBER Alert girl!” he yelled as he rushed to grab the girl from the man’s grasp and safely whisk her to a back room in the café.

Another person began taking photos as the abductor fled in his SUV. A few hours later, authorities arrested 52-year-old Duncan Mahi, who witnesses identified in a photo lineup. Mahi remains in custody as he awaits trial for charges that include kidnapping and sexual assault.

“It was really incredible,” Leonard says of the two citizens who were dubbed the “Hilo Heroes.” When Leonard asked them what gave them the courage to intervene knowing the man was armed, they both said they felt compelled by the MAILE AMBER Alert. “The café host said he responded in the way he would want someone else to respond if it had been his little sister or cousin,” she says. “It was definitely a testament to the power of the program and the Big Island community.”

Three for three: Lessons learned Hawaii’s Amanda Leonard suggests ways her fellow AMBER Alert Coordinators can apply lessons she’s learned in strengthening Hawaii’s program. Don’t let the past dictate the present. In 2018, Hawaii issued a missile alert in error, causing public confusion and panic. That incident may have had the unintended consequence of causing some law enforcement officials to be timid about issuing emergency alerts, including MAILE AMBER Alerts. Leonard makes sure to point out in her training that any comparisons with the false missile alert are “apples and oranges.” “There’s always going to be concern about making mistakes,” she says. “But with missing children, I think the public would want us to always err on the side of caution. AMBER Alerts are lifesaving alerts.” Be an engaged communicator. Leonard continually works on public awareness and talks to the media to make sure they and the public understand that a MAILE AMBER Alert “is a call to action.” She takes every opportunity to explain the criteria, including why cases of lost or runaway children don’t qualify for an AMBER Alert. “We owe our community that explanation.” Tap into training. Networking, such as through NCJTC, is invaluable. “We wouldn’t be able to be successful without that,” she says. She also focuses on building relationships with law enforcement leaders, which can take extra effort due to turnover.On the heels of that case, about five months later the Maui Police Department issued its first MAILE AMBER Alert. In February 2023, an island-wide alert was disseminated for a 3-month-old boy whose mother had fled with him after the father was granted sole legal and physical custody. Shortly after the alert was issued around 2 a.m., authorities received a tip on the whereabouts of the mother, who was wanted for custodial interference and was in violation of a temporary restraining order between herself and the child. The baby was safely recovered.

“We have a 100 percent success rate so far—knock on wood,” Leonard says. “When you look at these three consecutive alerts, I think it shows we’re on the right track.”

Partnering for a cause

For Leonard, the fact that Hawaii has had an increased number of alerts—with about 300 recoveries a year when factoring in other types of missing children cases—is a direct correlation to increased education and training. “The criteria for issuing a MAILE AMBER Alert did not change—it was the program development that we’ve worked on since 2018 that changed,” she says.

Leonard considers partnerships with organizations such as the NCJTC a key to success. National and regional NCJTC meetings have provided training by national experts, the ability to meet survivors from across the country, and valuable networking.

“We wouldn’t be able to be successful without those partnerships and being able to meet other folks who have our jobs in other states,” she adds. “It’s been absolutely instrumental.”

She also praises the dedication of law enforcement authorities and those working on behalf of children who consider their work a lifestyle and a calling more than a job.

“There’s no better feeling than getting a call that a child has been safely located alive,” Leonard says. “It makes me feel like we have one of the most important jobs in our state.”

Remembering Maile

Photo of Maile Gilbert
Maile Leilani Gilbert (1979–1985)

The “MAILE” acronym in Hawaii’s AMBER Alert program is in memory of 6-year-old Maile Gilbert, who was abducted by a family acquaintance from her Kailua home and murdered in August 1985. MAILE stands for “Minor Abducted in Life-threatening Emergency.”

Hawaii opted to add a local connection to the national AMBER Alert program—created as a legacy to 9-year-old Amber Hagerman. Amber’s 1996 abduction and murder in Arlington, Texas, sparked nationwide efforts to prevent future incidents.